The Healing Path of the Sacral Chakra: Integrating The Blinded Self

From emotional bypassing to emotional sovereignty

The body is the physical adornment draped over the invisible framework of the chakra system. And when we approach healing with the understanding of this unseen framework, we must begin at the root chakra- the conception point, the foundation upon which everything is built. So if you haven’t already read The Healing Path of The Root Chakra: Integrating The Forgotten Self, please start there and tend to the authentic essence of who you are physiologically, personally and spiritually, and then come back to this piece, to explore the second of the seven healing paths, the sacral chakra.

If you’re new here and the term chakra repels you or makes you forget that I’m writing about health and have nearly two decades of clinical experience, please read What Do The Chakras Have To Do With Your Health, and then return to this series with an open mind. From my perspective, just as every organ in the body has a physiologic function and purpose, each chakra plays a specific role in the subtle or energetic dimension of self. I associate each chakra with a unique theme and wound pattern that can be expressed physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually. Because of the close relationship between the chakras and tissues of the nervous and endocrine systems, the chakras can bridge our conscious and unconscious awareness, the seen and unseen, our inner and outer worlds. This is why I find knowledge of the chakra system to be just as valuable as knowledge of anatomy and pathophysiology to my medical practice- because understanding the chakras helps me identify the unconscious forces that are impacting my patients’ health. When we become aware of those unconscious forces, radical remissions are not that radical and spontaneous recoveries are not that spontaneous. When we integrate the unconscious we can expect miracles.

In my opinion, the sacral chakra is frequently misrepresented. It’s often embraced as a center of creativity and sexuality. It’s a focal point for western tantric practitioners that are hyper focused on channeling life force for pleasure and spiritual connection, in relationship with another (or others). But so often these practitioners are stuck in a blindspot where they’ve lost sight of the tantric path as it continues up the invisible ladder toward the mahamudra- the great orgasm- complete oneness with the divine. This piece is not about the tantric path, but that blindspot is such a perfect reflection of the sacral wounding that (mis)guides us in the west. When the sacral chakra is wounded we are unaware of something so important. We cannot see the emotional currents that control the flow of our lives, and hence I call the healing path of the sacral chakra, the integration of the blinded self.  

The sacral chakra is highly involved in the emotional quadrant of self. It matures in the second seven year cycle from age 7-14. Rudolf Steiner characterized this period of childhood as a time to emphasize the beauty of life. Beauty, pleasure, attraction and all the stuff western tantrics love to love are very relevant at the sacral because desire is the force that moves us in life (often unconsciously), but there is more to the sacral than that. It is no coincidence that the developmental time period of the sacral chakra runs parallel to puberty- a time in our lives when hormones are changing, emotional waves are unpredictable and drama is high. In some ways, the element of water tells us everything we need to know about the emotional context of this time- one moment the sea can be so calm, and the next a tsunami can take out civilization. Skilled surfers know that when you watch and understand the waves you can learn to ride them. But if you aren’t paying attention- if you are unaware of the waves, they will likely crush you. Emotion is no different. In an ideal world, from age 7-14 we would all be taught how to really feel things and surf emotional waves so that we can develop true emotional intelligence- the kind of intelligence that celebrates sensitivity by protecting it with boundaries. But few of us had this kind of guidance. During these highly emotional years, many of us were told we were too dramatic or too sensitive. We were told to stop crying or that we were being irrational (as if irrationality is a bad thing). And in this subtle (or not so subtle) messaging we learned to emotionally bypass. When I say emotional bypassing, I’m talking about suppressing our feelings with rational thought. It’s not intentional but it’s what we do. In fact, many of us go to talk therapy with the intention of feeling and healing emotionally- but every time we talk over our tears, or we make excuses for inappropriate laughter or we use words to break the discomfort of silence, we bypass our emotions. And this is the foundation of the primary sacral wound pattern- the wound of denial.

Denial is a tricky wound to work with because to be in denial is also to be unaware that you are in denial. It’s a blindspot. What we are unable to see is that our lives are a series of reactions to emotions, aka biochemical states. We want more of the things that feel good (think joy, pleasure, serotonin, dopamine, and oxytocin) and less of the things that feel bad (think anxiety, sadness, cortisol and adrenaline). All of our actions in life are propelled by the desire for pleasure and avoidance of pain. In Buddhism this cycle of craving and aversion is considered to be the root of all suffering. Our feelings are impermanent- but when we’re in denial and stuck in this cycle we can’t see that this too shall pass. If we’re able to sit with our emotions for long enough to feel them to completion, we can replace those instinctive reactions that are driven by the unconscious desire for comfort with an intentional response. The former often makes us feel like we’re victims of fate and misfortune, whereas the latter empowers us to create the destiny we choose.  When we bypass our feelings or we prematurely react to them, we miss out on the intelligence contained within those feelings. We miss out on the healing that happens by simply feeling. The wound of denial drives unconscious patterns and behaviors. It is the seed of addiction, disappointed love, people pleasing behavior, empathic exhaustion, undesirable relationship patterns and a slew unhealthy habits. If we don’t learn to cultivate equanimity in the face of hormonal and emotional volatility as children, we grow up to be adults that are predisposed to postpartum and perimenopausal challenges, as well as diagnoses like PMDD and infertility. This wound is so deeply impeded in our medical system that we still call the surgical removal of a woman’s uterus a hysterectomy! Yes, it was actually believed that the uterus was responsible for women being hysterical, and hysteria, or emotional range was considered pathological. We’ve come so far … but not far enough.

To heal the wound of the sacral chakra we must learn to pause and cultivate patience. We must learn to feel. And we must learn to sit with discomfort. We have to sit for long enough to let the storm pass so that we can gain control of our emotions- and then we choose what and who we attract into our lives. It is through this emotional mastery that the sacral creates. This creativity can impact all areas of our lives. Sometimes it means sitting in the discomfort of single life, resisting the urge to settle for the wrong partner. Sacral work is essential for my clients who are eager to get pregnant but haven’t found the right partner yet. Pausing and increasing our tolerance for discomfort are foundational skills for emotional intelligence. This is not complicated but it’s also not easy. When we teach about the sacral chakra in our GNOSIS immersion, we do 24 hours of nobel silence- no eye contact, no reading, writing, exercising or technology- simply sitting with ourselves. This can teach us everything we need to know about the sacral. When we heal the sacral we reclaim our emotions as our responsibility AND our intelligence. So often I see heart broken clients who feel disempowered after a break up because they feel like they won’t ever be able to feel the kind of love they felt for their ex, without their ex. But when they heal the sacral they become aware that the love they felt was their oxytocin, their dopamine, their body chemistry and if they were able to create those states before they can do it again. When we heal the sacral we become emotionally sovereign, meaning that we have control over whats in our emotional field, so rather than unconsciously attracting people and situation that perpetuate undesirable patters, we can consciously choose what we attract in. There is so much more to say about the sacral chakra, and in a future piece I’ll share about the importance of this healing path for empaths and healers. I’ll also do a future post about the relational aspect of the sacral and how to use relationships as a tool in sacral healing. If this sounds like your work, stay tuned for a follow up piece on Friday where I will offer practical tools and guidance that you can apply to this healing path. With that said, if you have any requests for what you want to learn more about in this week’s  how to series, please share them in the comments below.

And for those who don’t subscribe to the how to series, here are a few simple exercises to support the healing path of the sacral chakra.

1. Set Emotional Boundaries

Emotional intelligence requires that you can distinguish what emotions belong to you (and are your responsibility to feel and heal) and what emotions belong to someone else. Processing other peoples’ emotions can be exhausting to you and it can prevent them from doing their own healing work. So start setting emotional boundaries. This can be as simple as pausing before you enter a social or relational situation and identifying everything you are feeling. When you leave the social situation repeat the exercise. Notice what has changed and ask yourself if this is because you picked up someone else’s feelings. If you have, close your eyes and visualize yourself returning them. If you are unsure, close you eyes and simply ask the forces seen and unseen that any emotional material your holding that does not belong to you be returned to its rightful owner.

2. Feel it to Heal it

Practice feeling things without rationalizing them. Notice the urge to explain why you’re feeling what you’re feeling and practice coming back to the feeling, as opposed to getting swept up in the thoughts and emotionally bypassing. If the discomfort of what you’re feeling is too much to bare act like a toddler. Cry, stomp your feet, whine or move your body and notice if the feeling changes.

3. Use Memory and Scent to Generate what you Want to Feel

Identify what you want to feel and recall a memory of a time when you felt that way. Close your eyes and visualize that memory as clearly as possible. Focus on the memory and the feelings it generates. Then associate it with a scent to connect the feelings to the present. Chose an incense or an essential oil you love that you can access later. Whenever you want to generate that feeling in the future, use that scent to help.